Step 6: What Should
I Communicate?

The tone should be concern. The intention should be clear. The message should be unwavering - “ We love you, we’ve always loved you, we’ll never stop loving you but we’re not willing to watch you kill yourself with drugs”. 

The family should definitely express concern but not sympathize with the addict. Sympathy is a form of agreement and can backfire by justifying the addiction. 

Without any anger or fear, the addict should “get” from everyone present that the situation is known and that he or she needs treatment. Don’t allow stories of family problems and life’s troubles divert the attention off the point that the addict has a problem and needs to seek help fixing it. This is where the family’s preparation pays off.

The message should contain love and emotion, but it should never accept any solution short of "go get help." In many cases, if the situation has been planned correctly, the addict already knows that rehab is imminent and agrees quickly. In other cases, many issues will have to be gone through until the person agrees. Either way, the message should be universal among participants and unwavering.

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